Chairwoman of the Floor

Yep, I’ve fallen through a chair. Twice!

Fun fact: Charles Darwin added wheels to his laboratory chair, in order to be able to move freely and have easy access to his tools and paper. Isn’t that creative?

It’s Sunday (family day, as my dad calls it) and we’re circled around a table playing board games, one I made and a classic: Monopoly.

We were having a good time when all of a sudden, I dropped from sight. If I had been in any other chair, this might have been funny to watch.

My brother and friends came over to help me up. My butt was stuck in the chair! Yes, that’s right. The bottom had given out, but the foundation of the chair was still in tact and my big butt was stuck inside that square chair!

Fun fact: Chairs were only used by rich people in the old days. Common folks used to have to sit on the ground, or on a stool. You know, if they were lucky.

So it turns out, my dad’s old chair has a small square flat piece on top of the frame and that piece had come loose, however, maybe it was a sign that I should lose a few pounds.

I say that because last summer the exact same thing happened to me. I was sitting with friends on the back porch on a nice, hot day and the wicker chair I was sitting in decided it didn’t like me. It full-on took its own life to take me out! That’s right. The chair caved in on my behind and I tumbled to the porch.

Either chairs don’t like me or I just have desperately bad luck with them.

Note to self: sit like a ‘common’ person–on the ground, where it’s safe.

Yours truly,

A Clumsy Writer



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